Mak Ayam Yang Bodoh

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Chickens are gregarious birds and live together as a flock. They have a communal approach to the incubation of eggs and raising of young. Individual chickens in a flock will dominate others, establishing a "pecking order," with dominant individuals having priority for access to food and nesting locations. Removing hens or roosters from a flock causes a temporary disruption to this social order until a new pecking order is established. Adding hens, especially younger birds, to an existing flock, can lead to violence and injury. - Wikipedia

Some people just cannot shut their mouths up or they tend to speak (or rather, peck) their minds too loud that it makes you wonder whether to shoot back at these motherfuckers or just keep quite. I choose to remain silent for the sake of friendship.

The general perception on those unmarried 40's and above and having a lopsided sexual orientation would be that they are a bunch of angry-headed, foul-mouthed control freaks. A bit harsh as it may sound but not unheard of.

These are the heartless energy-suckers that will squeeze you up to your last blood. These are the lonely looneys whose only craving in life is attention and praise from the butter uppers.

These are those worth being hang on pillory in public.

"They don't call me Mak Ayam for nothing tau..." - Christz the infidel hen with golden comb and wattles when asked on the recent government move to set the ceiling price for chicken at RM5.60/kg.

No punt intended.

A room for two...and the rest is history

I was with the K.Y gang last week. Mooty had a bad ache on his back, Abg J (Abg J has a nifty fingers that churn magical decoratives and everything art-sy) needed his fortnight dose of handjobs a.k.a massage and Shah (a dandy looking bachelor with pan-Arabic look and a loyal customer of Auntie slimming pill) just being a plain tag-a-long.

We arrived that night, full of hopes and expectations passing through a group of physically able men whose eyes vigilantly cast on us. My only hope is that the place won't be like the one i have had been into in the past- you know, that seedy, suspicious looking joint with gloomy ambience and infused with strong smelling ylang-ylang.

I was taken aback the moment i step into the place. My only hope has not materialised. The place was indeed gloomy, fancy and not to forget ylang-ylang smelling. We seek refuge at the corner of the center, partly hiding ourselves from the other customers at the waiting area and partly from a group of physically-able men in shorts and singlets.

Abg J, was given an album. After a flip through or so, he was led to a cubicle where he'll get his healthy dose of handjobs a.k.a massage. Mooty was next. Wearing a rather unassuming look, Mooty tagged along his masseues. What left were Shah and I and the rest of the hopefuls and the physically-able bunch.

I was offered a place in a sauna room. I was contemplating at first for that 'risky' offer and on the physically-able men inside and outside the center. After a split seconds of weighing the pros and cons, i decided to take the offer. I was alone inside that humid room. I was still contemplating even as i was inside the room. I could see several bewildered eyes peeking through the small sauna window. Some wore that "knock-knock who's inside" look while others wore that look similar to that of the hopefuls at the waiting area.

We left at last... with mixed feelings. As i passed through the group of physically-able men outside the center on our way back home, i was still contemplating. But this time on the physically-able men alone and not on the sauna. Why they do the things they did inside.

Why..oo why..?

The humid room where the physically-able men work

Of Kelisa, Kedah and Kari Kambing Kawah

I was in Alor Star a couple of days back. I was there partly to fulfill my filial responsibility as a son and partly to relinquish my long lost memory of Alor Star and the who's who in my dad's family tree. It has always be the case where mom's relatives are better known than that of Dad's. I wont dwell on this. Perhaps later when i have a child of my own.

Cik Zah in her elements at Hj. Ramli's

As far as my memory serves me, Alor Star hasn't change that much. Not since my last visit on my official assignment couple of years back; taxi driver still didn't use meter and charge fare at a predetermined rate (but i dont mind this as i understand their predicament and the hardship working as a taxi driver in an almost-shanty town like Alor Star), there is hardly any new development took place save for the new housing areas and Pekan Rabu is still the main attraction whenever you're in Alor Star despite the utterly imposing structure of Menara Telekom Alor Star.

There are two things that i am looking forward to whenever i hit the road away from K.L. These are: 1. Food and 2. Chances of stumbling upon plants and its peripheral.

On this fateful trip, i managed to salvage several polybags of plants and indulged in a heavenly kampong food.

Pak Ya was time and again reminded by his friend to not to miss Restoran Hj Ramli whenever in Alor Star. And so our top agenda has been to dutifully find this place and eat. As luck may have chanced upon us and thanks to Pak Ya's razor sharp memory of Alor Star's whereabouts, we found Hj Ramli's and eat our hearts out at this juntion. It was hell of good food they served there, no joke. The food was quintessentially Kedah. The only downside is perhaps you gonna have to bear the long queue.

Burpps.. Alhamdulillah.

The Kuala Lumpur Food Shortage

I could never be able to experience a near-famine condition in my whole life while in K.L if i hadn't hang out with The K.Y gang. And by the way, K.Y stands for Kak Yah - a dilapidated food joint tucked amongst the 'seedy' enclave of Taman Dagang where we hang around to dine, to brag and to loosen up.

You see we have been experiencing the unnecessary shortage since the third day of Raya. Almost all food joints that we used to go were closed. Even the trusted Burger boys weren't around to cater for our insatiable hunger.

So for the past 3 days or so, we have been scoured around for food only to be dissappointed by the empty and mice-infested joints.

Last night i was with the The K.Y gang. After a rather dismall (?) Raya meet up at Taman Shamelin, Mooty (a close friend with big heart and half better than anyone elses) and i decided to head for Tesco Ampang. It seems at first this was our last bastion to trudged at on our unholy quest for the F & B.

True enough we've made it and won the battle against hunger. But it wasn't the sweetest of victory for the service at Kluang Station was 'delayed' and the food has becoming less tempting.

There goes my soul train...

Lucky no. 30

The '30' seems to be my best number in recent months. More often than not, i can't help my self but to quote this number whenver i was asked about my much awaited (not!) wedding. It feels like this number is my only way out to end and refute the unwanted conversation.

Q:"So bila hang nak kawen?"
A:"Umor 30 tahun"
Q:"Awat lewat sangat?"
A:"Abah pun kawen umor 33"
.......the end (phewws!)

Pak Lang and Mak Lang together with Kak Mazni's and Kak Mazlina's families were in K.L since Tuesday. They have been my favourite relatives to hang out with whenever i was in Penang not only because of Kak Mazlina's thick Utara accent but also by the sheer delight of being amongst them. For to them, being pretentious and 'propah' are so not proper.

Let 'em out and be yourself.

Geli-geli & Buas-buas

Geli-geli (Cyrtosperma lasiodes) adalah tumbuhan yang digunakan untuk merawat penyakit gout, sakit buah pinggang dan herba untuk bersalin.

Buas-buas (Premma cordiflora) adalah tumbuhan yang digunakan untuk rawatan membuang angin dalam badan, membuang cacing dalam perut dan mandian ibu selepas bersalin.

The only thing that has never failed to amaze me and soothe me is perhaps, The Plant and every aspects of it. The Human on the other hand, has always been (and will always be) the subject for incessant contentions and ramblings. No doubt about it.

On this note and this sudden rush to explore, i shall embark on a journey to find the sweetest concoctions of Life made out of The Plant and The Human for my soul and ultimately the Higher Being . May Allah help me.

Ameen.